I guess i can chime in here since i am "traditionally" an armor modeler and just now getting deep into figures.
Planet armor was a good site, and has died and been reborn several times. I haven't been there in a while
armorama is a nice community, i recommend them for anyone interested in armor and they are much more approachable.
missing lynx has a reputation as being a little harsh to newcomers but the breadth of knowledge is unbeatable.
Rivet counters exists in all forms, in all modeling hobbies. I have seen it here myself with arguments over the historical accuracies of a roman cavalry figure. Remember that not every rivet counter is RIGHT no matter how LOUD they can be
however the historians can be very useful for information, they tend to be passionate about their subject.
Just ask yourself: is it a hobby for you? do you do it to relax? if the answer to either of those is YES then don't sweat it. Build what you like and don't mind the small stuff.
P.S. I am a fan of leaving planet figure to figures, there are more than enough places to get armor news and help. I have found that there are fewer sites for figures that are active and like the little oasis here