Panic buying.....not me !

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fogie said:
A local doctor here once told me that years ago he got an urgent call from a patient who was in a panic because his
little lad had just swallowed a condom. When the ambulance turned up, with its blue light blazing, the father opened
the door saying, "Panic over...everything's fine....My wife's just found another one ! "

Mike
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I'll have to remember that one
 
Chris Oldfield said:
From a previous life, I can remember a guy whose favourite party trick was to pull one over his head to just under his nose, then inhale through his mouth & exhale through his nose to inflate it to a height of about 2 feet. Very impressive!

Just doing some modelling at the moment, & listening to an episode of Round The Horne on BBC Sounds. I can remember listening to this show on a Sunday afternoon when I was a nipper in the 1960s, completely ignorant of what all the double meanings in it were all about.......it’s even funnier now I do understand them all. Kenneth Williams was one of the funniest comedians who ever lived.
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Maybe we did meet in Belfast after all!!!
 
On a slightly lighter note, on returning to the site homepage I noticed a large banner ad from a major online retailer offering condoms at discounted prices...…..
They never miss a trick - the analysts are fully aware that one of the major long-term effects of everyone being confined at home/self-isolating will be a massive spike in the birthrate!


condom.png
 
The situation in Germany is already very serious - soon it will be catastrophic!
The hairdressers had to close now too.

We will still be happy that we are locked up in our apartments and houses, for after three or four months without a hairdresser we will all look something like this:




 
Martin Rohmann said:
And just I'm reading: BoJo got it now ...
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Apart from the fact that I totally miss the relation between the posted picture and Boris Johnson ( a very wise politician who managed to get Brittain liberated again ) I can't help getting the feeling that you seem to take some sort of "joy" in the fact that Mr.Johson got infected by this terrible virus. Please Martin, convince me I got it all wrong because In this case I would hate to be right if only for your sake....
 
HansDig said:
Apart from the fact that I totally miss the relation between the posted picture and Boris Johnson ( a very wise politician who managed to get Brittain liberated again ) I can't help getting the feeling that you seem to take some sort of "joy" in the fact that Mr.Johson got infected by this terrible virus. Please Martin, convince me I got it all wrong because In this case I would hate to be right if only for your sake....
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Hans

I have taken out the picture ....

It's a horrific virus and far too many are succumbing to it ...no matter who it is I am sure we all want them better ....irrespective of any politics or if we aren't keen on them


TO EVERYONE

Please remember we could have members that are affected or know some dealing with this pandemic ....we have a member her in the front line in Portugal ....

I salute HUGO PERERIA and all the team with him

KEEP THIS THIS THREAD LIGHT PLEASE

Nap
 
In a world gone mad...a world of global lock downs, individual mass isolation, escalating death tolls - there
is often something so banal that happens which somehow appears even more surreal. Such a thing happened
to us this morning.

We have received a reminder from the travel company requiring payment for this year's holiday - we planned
to return to Italy in June for ten days in Tuscany followed by the same again in Sorrento. My intial reaction
was, I'm ashamed to say, to succumb to a bit of a rant and wonder just what planet they were on. However,
wiser councils prevailed and I decided to give it a while before I spoke with them. Does anyone have any
suggestions as to how I might tell them the bad news ?

Mike
 
:LOL: You could always suggest they might like to turn on 'Teletext' on their TV and switch to World News. Your reminder might have been generated automatically, to be fair.
I would certainly sympathise with you, Mike, if you suggested that they stick it all where the sun don't shine, but it is a laughable situation. I should think you're amongst thousands in the same boat.
I'll bet some of the wags on here will have some interesting suggestions :LOL:

Alan
 
fogie said:
In a world gone mad...a world of global lock downs, individual mass isolation, escalating death tolls - there
is often something so banal that happens which somehow appears even more surreal. Such a thing happened
to us this morning.

We have received a reminder from the travel company requiring payment for this year's holiday - we planned
to return to Italy in June for ten days in Tuscany followed by the same again in Sorrento. My intial reaction
was, I'm ashamed to say, to succumb to a bit of a rant and wonder just what planet they were on. However,
wiser councils prevailed and I decided to give it a while before I spoke with them. Does anyone have any
suggestions as to how I might tell them the bad news ?

Mike
Click to expand...

I'd mail or call them telling them that you plan to send their reminder to one of the better British newspapers, put it on Twitter, Facebook etc.etc. within one hour unless they withdraw this stupid request. This mostly helps.
 
fogie said:
In a world gone mad...a world of global lock downs, individual mass isolation, escalating death tolls - there

is often something so banal that happens which somehow appears even more surreal. Such a thing happened

to us this morning.



We have received a reminder from the travel company requiring payment for this year's holiday - we planned

to return to Italy in June for ten days in Tuscany followed by the same again in Sorrento. My intial reaction

was, I'm ashamed to say, to succumb to a bit of a rant and wonder just what planet they were on. However,

wiser councils prevailed and I decided to give it a while before I spoke with them. Does anyone have any

suggestions as to how I might tell them the bad news ?



Mike
Click to expand...



Mike
Say..............................That sounds great, how much were you thinking of paying me to go there, its going to have to be a lot of money and you will need to provide me a private jet to the door of my own private Hotel with all food delivered to bottom floor in lift. I hope to look outside each morning and see you standing on the street below so I can wave at you each day. Also you will not get a refund if I decide not to go, requiring your payment in full in the next 14 days to confirm my response
 

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